"Shu Lin, have u ever considered taking up law instead of dietetics?"

These words seem to have describe my personality a little.. i guess. My uni frenz suggested this to me, but of course I'll still stick to my current course. Yes, though hectic and all... at least i am enjoying what i'm doing though. I don't think i'll actually be a very good lawyer IF i do take up law. Don't think my small brain can think that fast gua... =P

Lately i'm really not being myself. Mumbling to myself and staring into space without realising it. Not my usual day dreaming style, more of... as if my mind's left floating about in space. What's the culprit to this strange behaviour of mine? I myself am not sure too.

Stress? Impossible! that's not how i react to stressed out.

Depressed? maybe... but why would I be depressed? Relationship? Maybe. do i love him? i can't answer that question. have i ever loved him? yes, if not why would i want him? so why i don't want him now? erm... many many resons, and i know that things would be better that way. He claimed that i'm selfish, only know how to make use of others, couldn't be bothered bout other ppl's feelngs. That i made not only him to suffer under me, but also my friends. And also on how much time, effort, money he had spent on me, all he gets in return from me is heartache. I dunno how true is that, but as far as I can recall, i've never asked him to especially buy me gifts, to sponsor me for my meals (normally i ask to split the bill so it's fair for both of us), or to buy me roses/ soft toys/ any gifts even for valentine. But all his words can't be just a lie... there must be some truth in it right? i don't know, i just D-O-N-T - K-N-O-W!

GARH!! I DON'T KNOW! After I officially end this relationship, i don't think i'll dare get myself involve in another relationship.... maybe not for another 5 years... or 50 years! but I can't predict the future, if I do come across a person where i can't help myself but to fall for him, maybe i'll give it a go...only if he can fulfill my high demands! =)



**** change topic (this topic makes me upset)



coloured contact lense! haha, that's probably the most interesting experience i've ever had for the week. we (me, tracy, jenn, erica, y.mun, cheryl) went to try out the 'FRESHLOOK interCampus Search 2007' couple of days ago. I wouldnt say we look very different, infact we looked almost the same if it's not for the make up. I felt that the coloured contact lense i wore (it's pure hazel by the way) made me look like... a cat? or maybe it's the make up? (my frenz said the make up made me look like a china gal... rosy cheeks and all). this time there'll be no pic... need to wait for those frenz of mine to pass me the pictures first.

frenz said i look nice in that colour, very natural looking and all but... i prefer my natural colour. =) but that's not the best part, the best part is watching my frenz (erica & y.mun) removing the contact lense. =) took them quite a lot of effort,where someone else had to help them remove the lenses. but it's understandable that it's not easy for ppl to get used to putting on and removing contact lense.

We spent almost 30 min in the ladies attempting to remove the contact lenses. ^^ cheryl was gentle with erica's contact lense, but tracy... haha!! it ALMOST seem like she could remove y.mun's whole eyeball out instead of just the contact lense! =D haha...

oh ya, before i sign off...

a special thanks to hwei ming, yan ming, erica, y.mun, val, jenn, w.jhe and others who showed signs concern to me when i was in my 'out of the world mood' (to those i didn't mention their name here, sorry la k? i just can't seem to concentrate on anything then). oh, and thx matt, for cheering me up with... siccor paper stone? haha, should play that game more often. Also, i'm really sorry to those i've offended when i'm not in my usual mood. I know there's times where i'm moody and all... So i might have vented my anger towards those around me. U may not show that u're offended by my actions, but I do know my mistakes, but at times i'm just not wiling to accept it. >.<

Signing off!